Musings
2/24/25
Creation date. A.M.
At work. Post french vanilla. Thinking about what. Not much. Unfinished conversations. Open-ended feelings. Brief interactions. Travel and credit card points and cleaning my room. Friends. I think it's good to minimize, so what is this for?
2/25/25
P.M.
In bed. Post ice cream. You're thinking about socks and creating space. Transforming spaces. You're thinking about change. You're thinking about all the times you've disagreed with someone and how lovely that can be. about the tip of your tongue and all the secret thoughts that live there. about being excited for a new book in a series when you were still a child. printing off the green slips at the bookstore and stuffing them in your pocket. worrying you were printing too many and someone might tell you off. ink and paper and "how can i help you today?"
2/27/25
P.M.
At work. Post iced latte. Thinking about the great to-do list and what it must feel like to check everything off of it. Eighth grade turning in my science project late and Mr. Wu taking off so many marks for lateness to prepare me for high school. I felt so bad for disappointing him. I remember the great anxiety, the looming over everythingness of it. I remember turning in an art project and losing marks for it being unfinished - I hadn't coloured it in. I explained to the teacher that I preferred it black and white. It didn't get me back the marks but I didn't want him to think I was just a lazy so and so. It was a drawing of the water bottle on my desk, complete with shadow. I was proud of that drawing. I hope I do more things that make myself proud this year. Things that would've made 13 year old me proud too.
3/6/25
P.M.
At work. You wonder how you could ever get bored of anything at all. You walk down your street and do it again three hours later and find it's changed already. You have an hour that feels so, so full, and maybe nothing happens but really everything is happening all of the time. You feel weightless, then heavy, happy and sad at the same time, you're full of rage and joy and longing and you're pulled like the tomcat toward the pie on the windowsill. Then you sit down and for a second something tells you you're bored, but no you're raring to go and have been for the longest time. What's the verb to laugh without asking yourself if it's earned? Act without recourse. It's not an abandon, it's not anything you really know how to talk about or write about or crack wise about, but maybe something you can hold hands and dance about. Why delineate? It's so rare to celebrate we ought to all do it more often with as many people and in as many ways as possible! You want to speak plainly but the plainest thing you can muster is a big goofy smile on your face!